Holistic Purist …. Or Not
Poison coursing through my veins
seeking its malignant target
but attacking the innocent
leaving a destructive path:
Hair loss, fatigue, neuropathy.
The price to pay for life.
Almost a year to the day, I had witnessed a beloved friend, a holistic purist, waste away slowly before my eyes from a robust 180 pound woman to a skeletal 97 pounds.. Her decision to remain a holistic purist cost her her life. I decided this was never going to be me, as I faced a lifesaving dilemma: choose traditional chemotherapy or risk death.
I chose the chemotherapy, but had to make peace with that choice. Over twenty years ago, I had turned from traditional to holistic medicine with great results: my physician loved to exclaim, “You have the body and health of a woman twenty years your junior.”
Heretofore, I saw chemo as poison (bad), and I knew I would have to reconcile this view for it to work towards my healing. I would be required to I adjust my mental outlook and welcome it into my body without reservation (good).
A dear friend, with holistic/metaphysical knowledge, and firmly rooted in spiritual wisdom told me, “At the time it was introduced, chemotherapy was a gift from God. I believe in using the best of all medicines that He has provided.” Another friend pointed out that even some naturopathic cures are derived from poisonous plants.
I concluded that the intention of God’s chemo gift was to target and destroy cancer cells. The destructive side effects were to healthy cells, and this was not part of God’s intention. In actuality, only the pharmaceutical companies benefit from the side effects; there is great profit in marketing drugs to combat these symptoms.
I recalled attending a workshop of Dr. Bernie Seigel, a renowned physician who encouraged his patients to use visualization during their treatment. Consistent with his technique, I created the following affirmation, and I decided to show God my appreciation for the gift as it was intended.
“I command and visualize the chemo coursing through my veins for its intended purpose: to find the targeted cancer, attack, and eliminate it; bypassing all my healthy cells.”
And to be on the safe side, just in case some strays got misplaced, I visualized the “Clean-up Crew”:
a team of tiny Goddesses gliding through my blood vessels, removing the chemo from healthy cells, placing it in beautiful urns and pouring the poison elixir over the cancer, its intended target.
As I affirmed these words, a feeling of peace washed over me; I was able to lovingly embrace the gift.
Poison coursing through my veins
reaching its intended target.
Life-giving poison.
Author of You CAN Go Home Again
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Amy, You are handing this situation in your life with such dignity. Seeing how brave you through this process inspires me. <3 Thank you for sharing yourself with us!
Thank you, Laura. It’s people like you who lighten the burden for me.
Thank you Amy,
Your words I am just certain represent the thoughts of many who have faced this journey. I am very grateful to a dear lady, Gisela, for pointing out this article to me. Your recall on the workshop you attended, and sharing what you were able to put into action, brought forth an immediate visual for me. I will be adapting this awareness into my thinking, for sure. The dilemma in treatment options (especially, for some with complications), continues down the path of this journey, I am ever so grateful for your words of wisdom!
Shari, I am so pleased that you found my words to be helpful. My positive thoughts go with you as you continue on your journey.
Dear Amy:
I am glad you took the path of chemo. However, you are a very positive person and whatever path you took is the one that will work for you. Your expression was very sensitive and you willingness to share with others shall not be forgotten.
Roberta
Thank you, Roberta. Hopefully, my sharing will serve as an encouragement to some one else.
Rosaria – Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Your last sentence was especially poetic and heartwarming.
Hi Amy and the church said “AMEN”! Inspirational so inclusive of everyone’s thoughts and feelings about the treatment of chemotherapy . You make life a gentle pill to swallow.
Amy, You have a way of stating such complex issues so clearly. I think this post will inspire and empower many. Keep sharing!
Thanks, Carrie. This was my intention. I’m glad it came across that way.
Amy,
Uplifting and inspirational. I’m glad you posted this.
Chris Shaun
Chris, thank you for your encouraging remarks.
You are an amazing friend. Thank you for the goodness you share with others. God will never forsake you.
Thanks, Ellen. You uplift me in more ways than you’ll ever know.
Amy, this sounds like you have come A LONG WAY on your journey already. It’s just wonderful how you found a way to know the good and the bad, how you trust and welcome the good, and brush away but accept the possible bad as a necessary evil that will touch you very little. Your path to success is wide open. And I will be happy to help you clear away any possible debris.
Yes, thank you for sharing.
The kindness that you have already shared is a part of my healing. Thank you.
Amy, once again you employ wisdom, grace and a bit of light-heartedness to an issue that is often polarizing. A well thought out piece that helps us realize we need not see our world in strictly black and white terms but, instead, make room for the variations in between. May we each respond to a life affirming, inner compass that extends hope and good outcomes to all.
Maura, thanks for your encouraging remarks.
Thank you, Amy for sharing your journey. It helps others like myslef in the same condition to reflect on their journey and know that Prayer Works.
Frederick, it is such a joy to know you.